Ridiculous Enemies

Ask and you shall receive

I first want to begin by wishing you all a Happy Presidents’ Day.

Yeah, that’s how it’s supposed to be written, as a possessive plural, to indicate that it’s a day to honor all US presidents, though the possessive part is a little confusing.

However (and I only recently found this out), none of that really matters. In fact, it only serves to confuse things.

That’s because, pursuant to the US Code, specifically 5 U.S.C. § 6103(a), the federal holiday we observe today is still officially called “Washington’s Birthday,” even though his birthday isn’t until Saturday, the 22nd.

I promise not to torture you with the captivating details of the Uniform Monday Holiday Act of 1971. Just know that it’s the reason we got four more three-day weekends.

In any case, I believe that most of us still consider today a day on which we honor both George Washington and Abraham Lincoln, whose birthday is February 12. And, as far as I’m concerned, I think we should continue doing so, in proud violation of Section 6103.

Voltaire

The 18th century philosopher Francois-Marie Arouet, better known as Voltaire, considered one of the greatest French writers of all time, was a stauch advocate of freedom of speech and of religion.

Now, if that opening sentence led you to believe that I know the first thing about Voltaire, or any of the other major philosphers about whom I’m probably supposed to be more familiar, I can assure you I do not.

In my own defense, however, there is one thing I’ve always had a knack for, and that’s remembering really good quotes, whether they be from famous speeches, literature, poetry, or —especially— movies.

So, anyway, there’s this one line that I long ago heard attributed to Voltaire and it popped into my head earlier this week.

It goes like this:

"I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: 'O Lord make my enemies ridiculous.' And God granted it.”

I love that line!

Don’t worry, I won’t bore you with the historical background behind the quote, as I’d only be making it up as I wrote it for you.

I imagine, though, that as many of you read Voltaire’s words, you thought the same thing I did — that Republicans must have recently recited the very same prayer…and God granted it.

How else to explain the utterly ridiculous behavior of Democrat members of Congress over the past month?

Think about that for a moment. “Make my enemies ridiculous.” You couldn’t have written the arc of the last 28 days any more ridiculously than the progressive dimwits have spontaneously improvised it.

For today, at least, I’ll try to refrain from getting into the merits (or lack thereof) or validity (or invalidity) of any of their arguments. Instead, I’ll simply take full and gleeful advantage of the unforced behavioral errors they continue to commit. It’s gotten so out of hand that the GOP might consider revising its projected budget for the 2026 midterms. Maybe schedule an extra retreat or something, or get some new furniture for the headquarters building.

And, what has made the spectacle all the more beautiful to behold is the genuinely restrained and respectable manner in which Trump, Musk, and Republican Congressional leaders have responded…like sane adults.

Under normal circumstances, I’d probably try to describe the events in a certain sequence so as to create a sort of dramatic build-up leading to the most exceptionally unhinged episode. However, the lefty crazies have recently offered up so much material that I’ll make it easy on myself and generally list the incidents in chronological order.

I’m also perfectly aware that I’m probably leaving out a lot of good stuff, so feel free to leave a comment if you’re aware of something I missed.

I guess you could say that it all started at the beginning, when 14 House Democrats found better things to do on January 20 than to attend the inauguration of the 47th President of the United States.